Love

Faith, hope, love and perseverance are the pillars that are at the foundation of “Puzzled.” The pillars are what brought us through and keep us moving forward to share our story with others.

There are countless definitions of what love is, but the definition of love we like to go by is the biblical definition of love being a commitment to one another and not purely being a feeling and/or an attraction. We must be fully committed to each other through the good, the bad and the ugly. No matter what situation you may find yourself in, having someone there to love you through it is such a blessing.

Each of our miscarriages took their own track. A surgery, a loss early on or losses after several blood tests prove good until the bad ones came. Did we have a right to lay on the living room floor and cry, absolutely and we did. Did we have a right to ask God why us (each and every time), absolutely and we did. Did we have a right to excuse ourselves from events or different tasks, absolutely and we did.

Sure, we have scars, sleepless nights and wondering what was next for us during the challenging times. Together though we picked each other up. Slowly but surely, we moved forward one small step at a time. There were set backs, but together we navigated through them.

Those times are a direct reflection on why Love is a pilar of Puzzled. Love can carry you through nearly anything. In Ephesians 4:2 it states, “Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.”

Through our experience with our four miscarriages, we loved each other through the pain and suffering by staying committed to each other and honoring each other’s feelings and emotions during those moments. We truly stayed by each other’s side no matter what was going on.

We were not the only ones showing one another love during these times. If you are a dog (or animal person!) you will understand this one: Our two fur babies, Gabby and Breez stayed committed to both of us during our losses and times of sorrow. They were always by our sides, giving us kisses, licking away our tears, being that constant to talk to and giving us cuddles when we needed them the most. Animals are such a blessing and just know how to make their humans feel better!

Outside of our household, we had others show us love through it all. Our parents, siblings, close family and friends. They were all committed to giving us our space, but also being there for us when we needed to talk, when we came home from the hospital, through the days, weeks and months after each miscarriage. Our family and friends showed their commitment and love to us by continuing to send prayers for healing, understanding, and a future child.

We must always remember to be humble and gentle as we do not know what the others have gone through all day, week or month. Be patient and make allowance for other’s faults. Even in a world where social media makes everyone look like they have it together, people do not. Love wins in the end when we work at it and have God at the center of it.

We pray that if you are reading this blog as someone who has experienced loss or going through a difficult time that you have committed warriors to help love you and be with you through this time. We know that many may feel that love is far away or impossible. If you do not have a person or group or want to talk to us specifically, please feel free to reach out to us here at Puzzled (walkingpuzzled@gmail.com) and we can walk beside you.

XOXO

Mark and Megan